Dear BUDdy,
Please let me commend your marketing department for spreading the message to the world about ‘drinking responsibly’.  Unfortunately a large amount of people do not need that message,

Have you ever wondered why when an apple detaches from its mother tree, it falls downward and doesn’t fly upward?  Someone named Newton had a theory on that principle.  Mangos do the same thing. When it is time for them to detach

Even though my son was raised in another country, I taught him to love our homeland, the U.S.A...  Even though we lived in poverty with only 2 beds and cardboard boxes for night stands, I instilled American patriotism in him. 

Mrs. Fred, that’s me, likes to tell Mr. Fred (my hubby) how exciting he looks in his Indiana Jones khaki shirt!  He’s from New English so rarely needs a top coat or winter jacket here in the Appalachian Mountain towns. He is warm enough with his long sleeved khaki shirt over his uniform clothes.  I think he sees the bedroom sparkle in my eyes

Have you ever heard of the Alcoholic Anonymous joke that a pickle can never return to being a cucumber?
In my mind I compare we alcoholics and addicts to cute, walking-around, spring-green gecko lizards. 

I just got back from my parole officer appointment.  And I am gratefully amazed, because I realize that I had ‘ah ha’ moment. 

As I partied with my dad I felt cool.  This must have been a great thing.  After all, my dad let me drink at the age of nine.